What sells is bad news, lots and lots of bad news! It’s an old axiom that we all know to be true. The media doesn’t deny it. They bombard us with bad new day in and day out. So the questions is…how does this affect us? Can you stay positive in negative times?
To stay positive in the world today is a challenge of monumental proportion. Yet, I believe we can stay positive in negative times. And I think it is easier than it seems. I have three simple suggestions:
#1 Limit the Amount of Time You Watch the Media on TV.
With the proliferation of 24/7 cable news and easy access on your blackberry, laptops, phone & computers means you are only a moment away form the latest crisis, calamity and catastrophe. But is this healthy?
In an article entitled “Negative Psychological Effects of Watching the News on the Television” published in the International Journal of Behavioral Medicine outlines the results of a study done in 2 groups who watched a 15-min random newscast.
A measure of anxiety and positive or negative moods were taken of each group once before the news and once after the news. The results show that anxiety and negative moods increased, while positive moods decreased after watching the news. This proves that watching the news triggers negative feelings.
Now, we don’t need the results of a study to know that we feel bad after watching the news. But it is always nice to have a study done to prove we are right.
Of course, you must stay current on what is happening in the world.. You can’t just stick your head in the sand. But do you need to keep CNBC or CNN playing all day long? Do you really have to watch every move up or down, down, down in the market? No. It just repeats itself over and over again, anyway. Make yourself turn off the newscast after you’ve checked the news and don’t check it again until the following day.
Some may think I go to the extreme the other way. I watch only enough news to stay barely current. My husband might tell you I’m not always all that current. But I know for myself in order to keep a positive attitude, I can’t watch much TV period. When I do, I feel very lethargic, sad & have a hard time getting going. I know this so I prefer to read positive stories which brings me to Suggestion #2.
#2 Read Positive Stories of Survival and Perseverance.
I recently read Viktor Frankl’s powerful book, “Man’s Search for Meaning”. (Have any of you read it?) It’s been around awhile but still many copies are being sold.
He describes the powerful psychological journey during his three years in concentration camps during WWII. He found the “potential meaning of life” even in conditions where he lost his wife and parents, his children, all worldly belongings, his identity and even his security that he would live another 24 hours….day after day in miserable physical conditions.
He fought back hopelessness and endured conditions beyond most people’s imaginations, and he came to know first hand that though others can control your external existence, they cannot control your mind…and he clung to faith and beliefs that he would make it, and he did. He touched the lives of many, including mine.
It’s easy to stay positive when everything is going well. But not so easy when a storm hits. Is this not true?
My husband has been in mortgage banking for over 30 years and his employer ( a div. of Wachovia Bank) closed their business about a 1-1/2 ago. He has been unemployed since that time. He is working on getting a new business going as I am working on mine. Even though we are optimistic, things are a little intense financially for us right now & it looks like we may sell our house where we have lived for fifteen years. I’ll be honest, it’s very easy for me to get down about this. But when I think of people such as Viktor Frankl & other’s who have suffered horribly and have overcome amazing odds, having to sell a house doesn’t seem like such a big deal. I move from despair to gratefulness. This gives me a renewed sense of hope. Look for positive stories. There are plenty. And lastly,
#3 Surround Yourself with Positive People.
Have you ever heard the phrase, “We become part of what we are around?” The people you associate with have a profound affect on how you feel and ultimately what you achieve.
How do you feel after listening to negative people? You probably feel listless and drained, right? Renowned Psychologist & Motivational Speaker, Jack Canfield, describes them as “energy vampires” – they suck all the positive energy out of you. On the other hand, how do you feel when you’re around people who are positive and enthusiastic? I’ll bet you have more energy and are encouraged & inspired. We have a choice in who we hang out with. I’m not talking about your spouse or significant other. I’m referring to relationships both at work and in your leisure time.
I have a close relative who is very negative. She is as Canfield describes an “energy vampire”. I’ve had to put limits on my involvement with her. I haven’t abandoned her but I do not go out of my way to call her. I am in favor of trying to help those who are negative. I think we should make efforts to steer them in a more positive direction. But if we’ve tried for the many years and that person insists on being negative, maybe it’s time to severely limit the amount of time we spend with that person. Those who occupy your time have a significant impact on your most priceless possession…your mind!
In the last few years there has been a growing body of psychological research bearing out the power that one individual’s mood can have on others. Psychologists call it “Emotional Contagion”. A long term researcher, Richard Saavedra, from the University of New Hampshire states, “It is one of the most robust phenomena I’ve ever seen. And it’s all unconscious.”
We become part of what we are around! Surround Yourself with Positive People.
Life is a personal journey realizing that when everything outside of ourselves appears to be out of our control, we always have control of our own thinking. The Dalai Lama in his book “The Art of Happiness” says, “By bringing about a certain inner discipline, we can undergo a transformation of our attitude, our entire outlook and approach to living. When we speak of this inner discipline, it can of course involve many things, many methods. But generally speaking, one begins by identifying those factors which lead to happiness and those factors which lead to suffering. Having done this, one then sets about gradually eliminating those factors which lead to suffering and cultivating those which lead to happiness. That is the way.”
Limit the amount of time you watch the media on TV, Read positive stories of survival and perseverance and Surround Yourself with Positive People. Choose to be positive and you will enrich your life and those around you!
If you are one of the brave ones who still says “Merry Christmas” versus “Happy Holidays”, good for you! But even when you say, “Merry Christmas”, do you say it in the spirit of what it really is or do you say it stressed to the max because of the added financial burden or seeming lack of time for tree decorating, shopping, baking, etc.? Every Christmas season (which seems to roll around faster every year), the challenge is to remember what “Christmas” is all about. Many would certainly say it is everything but “Merry!” I want to share with you what I believe a “Merry Christmas” represents along with one simple suggestion to make it the “Merriest” ever!
